Things to avoid as a Mafia boss
by Preppy-Stealthy-Ninja
Summary: There were certain things you avoided as a mafia boss. Giotto found that out a little too late, and now he resorts to buying a diary to write down every mistake he makes. His guardians are a little baffled by this action, but Giotto insists he is doing this for the sake of future Vongola mafia bosses. Is buying a diary to write tips really the answer to save future Vongola bosses?
1. Because buying diaries are mainstream

**Preppy-Stealthy-Ninja:**_ My muse **Ninja** wanted me to write something light and humorous since all I have been doing for awhile is writing more serious fics. She attacked me viciously and didn't relent until I agreed to write this. Thus, the idea of this different shot story came to mind. I mean who better to teach future mafia bosses *cough* Tuna* what to avoid as a mafia boss than Giotto himself? (After Giotto himself experiences it, of course!)_

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**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn. All rights belong to Akira Amano ©.**

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_I don't like the idea of writing 'dear diary' because you aren't dear to me _yet_. But I must begin this somewhere._

A blonde with a questionable spiky hair gazed at his own writing; frowning a little as he wondered whether or not this was a good way to start his diary. He had just bought the book from a local bookstore. The small suede book was lodged in between thick heavy books and the woman who owned the shop had more than given it to him, even requesting that he buy it for a minimum price. The diary had been there for a long time and it didn't have a buyer yet. According to the shop owner, the book was cluttering up the shop and making it look ugly, and it was for that sole reason that she had lost many potential customers. The blonde didn't understand how one book could create such a difference to the shop. However, he didn't question it, instead, he just bought it from her, thanking her and rushing out of the door discreetly and furtively, watching quietly to see if anybody had followed him.

Right now he was sitting behind his desk, pretending to be doing paperwork as he wrote in his new diary. He was supposed to be signing a contract of allegiance for the Cavelleno family, but he had delayed it on purpose, instead, opting to run out of the mansion, clad in a disguised coat and big sunglasses and buying the diary that was now resting on his desk. He could hardly be blamed for resorting to such extreme measures. If it wasn't for his guardians—_especially G_—he would still be inside the mansion and signing contract, agreements and doing whatever mafia bosses do behind the scenes.

_I have decided to convert this into a journal full of tips so that aspiring mafia bosses could benefit from it._

It was a random noble thought that he just had in the spur of the moment. His life was hectic and full of craziness, enough to drive even the sanest person crazy. So, the blonde reasoned, to avoid that in the future, he could help other mafia bosses (mainly other future Vongola bosses) to abstain from such crazy mistakes.

"Hey, Giotto! Oi, what're you doing?" G, his childhood friend and right-hand man entered the room, sauntering slowly to his side. He grinned and stopped as he glimpsed a small blue book hiding between the arrays of contract sheets and raised an eyebrow, "what in the name of God is _that_ Giotto?"

Giotto, with a quick mind, scrambled forward, suddenly jerking backward in his seat as he tried to hide all evidence of owning a diary. If G had found out, he would never live it down with his constant teasing. Giotto liked to maintain a straight image, it wouldn't fare well with the public if they found out a powerful mafia boss had a diary he wrote his 'mushy' feelings on.

"What is what G?" Giotto asked casually, having thrown away all evidence and trying his best to smile breezily.

It didn't work on G. Giotto knew that, but he had tried in vain anyway, his best friend could see right through him.

The red head scratched his head, "I saw a small blue book in between those sheets. Fess up Giotto, you can't hide anything from me if you tried. Besides, what is _that_ sticking out of your chair? Are you _sitting_ on it?"

In his haste, Giotto had forgotten that he had put the book behind the chair, thus resulting in him sitting on it. What he hadn't expected, however, was the fact that it was sticking out like a sore thumb, demanding to be seen. How could his own diary betray him? He had just written a little of himself on it and it was going to pay him back like this?

"Nothing G, I told you. You were just imagining it. I was in the midst of signing a contract," Giotto placed a placid smile on his face, picking up a random paper from the stack that was littering his desk, "see? Nothing special. Unless of course you want to help me sign these, I need the help."

"You really are an idiot sometimes Giotto," G said, face-palming as he walked towards Giotto's desk and squatted so that he could glimpse at the book, "and sometimes you think we're all idiots with you."

Giotto watched helplessly as G grabbed the book and pushed it forward so that he could get a better look. He had a small smile on his face as he opened the book and read the few lines that Giotto had written. He snorted, "A diary huh?"

"Well you had no right to read this, G. You may be my best friend, but there are certain boundaries that you just don't cross," Giotto admonished, with a last effort to maintain his dignity.

G shook his head, flipping the book back and forth and weighing it in his hand. He looked at Giotto and suddenly burst out laughing, "Really Giotto. Where'd you buy this from? And why would you—Pfft!—buy a damn diary?"

Giotto felt embarrassed and wasn't surprised to feel his cheeks heating, but he still managed to bristle, "It was your fault anyway!"

G stared at his friend, raising his eyebrows. Giotto stared back defiantly. It went like that for a while until G couldn't take it anymore and burst into another bout of laughter. He was clutching his stomach, waving the book in the air, "God Giotto! Why?"

Giotto started protesting, but at that convenient moment, his two guardians, Lampo and Asari entered. Lampo gazed lazily from one eye and observed the scene with a bored expression, whereas Asari, with a jolly face, wondered what had occurred in the room.

"What happened to G," he asked, pointing at the red-faced G who was still clutching his stomach. From afar, it seemed as though he was wincing in pain.

Red-faced with embarrassment, Giotto felt compelled to tell him. He knew he could trust Asari—Lampo was too lazy to start telling everybody about it—he took a deep breath before he said, "I bought a diary today."

Asari frowned in confusion, "A diary?" He repeated. His eyes fell on G who was had stopped laughing and was now sitting up straight.

"A diary." Giotto affirmed, glaring at G.

"Why would you need a diary for, boss?" Lampo asked, his voice laced with boredom.

Why did I buy the diary? Giotto thought, giving G a sideways look. Giotto remembered why he had bought it and what drove him to escape out of the mansion to buy the diary. He may have been a mafia boss—a powerful one at that—but he had realized at an early stage that certain things were best written down, in case somebody else would repeat the same mistakes. And indeed, for that sole reason, he resorted to buy that diary. Yesterday's event was merely a catalyst that drove him forward (He still felt uneasy whenever he remembered _that_.)

"The reason why I bought this diary is..." Giotto began dramatically, glancing at his three guardians, "because I realized that as a mafia boss, I make many mistakes that I would rather not like repeated."

"What?" Lampo asked, his two eyes opening with surprise. That was quite a feat for Lampo, who usually opened one eye out of laziness.

"What mistakes?" Asari asked, his eyebrows furrowed together in confusion, "is this something we are not aware of?"

"Well you can't blame _me_ for your mistakes, man," G snorted.

Giotto sighed as his guardians reacted typically to their personalities. He wasn't even finished yet. They could input their opinions as much as they liked after he had finished.

"As I was saying," Giotto continued, grabbing the diary that had fallen out of G's hand, "since we are a vigilant organization of mafias who are always under the watchful eye of rival mafia families, I realized at an early stage that to avoid any conflicts, I should write down every mistake that I have done under the name of Vongola and try to solve it by writing down my solutions. Future Vongola mafia bosses will benefit from it and so will I, for knowing my organization is in safe hands. It's a mutual thing."

The last part was just a thought he had at the last minute. Why shouldn't he write down his mistakes and help other people? Giotto was a role model to most mafia families and they copied most of the things he did. So it was, without a doubt, a valid reason for him to buy a diary.

"I don't understand?" Lampo said; a quizzical look on his face, "what does this have to do with a diary?"

"That is very noble of you, boss," Asari said with a small smile, "however, I don't understand why you have decided to buy it now. We have been going on for a couple of years now and it seems a bit out of place for you to buy it now. But then, if you really are thinking about your successors, I do not mind what you do with this diary."

"Thank you, Asari," Giotto smiled, running his hand through the smooth suede, "I have my future successor's best interest at heart."

"Jeez Giotto, if you had such a noble thought like that, you could have told me before I jumped to conclusions," G said, running his hand through his red hair.

"Well you laughed at me before I could start!" Giotto countered.

"That was because I found the idea of you owning a diary funny," G said, snatching the book from Giotto's hands and flicking through it again, "I didn't notice the writing on it. Your writing is scrawly and small."

"Besides, you didn't answer Asari's question. Why did you buy it now?"

Asari and Lampo gazed curiously at him, wondering the same thing. Giotto smiled breezily, picking up a random paper and signing it, ignoring the question—_on purpose_. He was too embarrassed to tell them the real truth. Yesterday he had lied to his guardians and if he told the truth today, it would cause much controversy. Especially with G.

_SLAM!_

G's hands were on his desk and suddenly the papers scattered all around the room, dropping to the ground. Giotto looked up sheepishly, knowing full well that he was guilty. He stood up and wondered how he was going to explain it.

"You're hiding something from us, aren't you Giotto?" G asked, smiling smugly, "I know that face. You look guilty about something."

"We're not forcing you to tell us if you don't want to," Asari demurred, smiling at him.

"Hell yes he does!" G retaliated, "I'm interested in why our boss decided to buy this diary."

Giotto knew he didn't have a way out of this. He did lie to them, he reasoned to himself, so they have a right to know.

"Well..." Giotto began, "yesterday I courted Fiore Camillo and..."

G' nodded, a bored look on his face _"The_ Fiore Camillo? We already know that."

"You did say something about this," Asari said, thoughtful, "and who is Fiore Camillo?"

"Boss courted?" Lampo asked, his eyes widening in surprise, "I thought that he was prude or something, he never talked about girls."

"I'm not prude, Lampo!" Giotto protested, "I do like girls, but I don't have time to court or anything."

They all raised their eyebrows at that.

"Okay, let me explain please? I'll tell you the whole story about what happened yesterday and Fiore Camillo." Giotto pleaded, reclining back in his seat and heaving a sigh. He knew that this was going to be one long explanation. He'd better start now and clear the misunderstanding with his guardians. Giotto hated lying, and he especially hated lying to his guardians.

Asari nodded, Lampo shrugged and G gave him a sceptical look. Giotto smiled, and began.

"Yesterday after you entered my office G..."

* * *

**XxX—XxX**

**Vongola Office:**

"Agh! How many more papers do I have to sign, G?" Giotto asked, staring at the papers in front of him with something akin to horror.

This was the third time that a horde of papers had entered his office, all begging to be signed and read. Giotto just didn't have that amount of time in his hands and had requested some of his guardians to help. Of course Aluade refused (he had the CEDEF to handle), Daemon was too preoccupied with himself to care, Lampo had run away the moment the word 'help' was used, Asari had tried to help but realized that his potential didn't lie in signing papers and G...G was the one who kept getting the papers.

"As long as everything is finished, you can't complain boss," G said, bringing another stack, "you know that you have to finish most of them by the weekend or the contract will be nullified."

"But that's impossible!" Giotto cried, glaring at the papers, "I'm still human, you know."

"Well yes, but The Tortellini Family has especially requested that you finish it." G strode towards Giotto's desk and sighed, "they're known for their temper, so I don't think you should make a habit of angering them."

Giotto sighed and slunk into the papers, moaning, "How am I ever going to get out of this?"

He looked at the papers and grabbed his pen, before signing it with great speed. He would make the process quicker for himself.

"You know," G began, smiling slyly, "you could make it easier for yourself by courting The Tortellini boss's daughter, Fiore Camillo. I heard she was single and you need a bit of fun anyway."

"No G, I'm too busy for that," Giotto said absentmindedly, still signing.

"Come one, Giotto, you need a bit of fun to loosen up a little," G said, slapping Giotto on the back, "what harm will a little fun do?"

Giotto looked up from his papers, "You just told me that the Tortellini family is very hard to deal with and you expect me to court their daughter?"

"You wanted a break right?"

"Maybe, but not like this." Giotto answered, grabbing yet another paper and signing it with a flourish.

"I could have helped you while you were away having fun," G said, leaning against the desk, "but if you want to be cooped up in here…"

"What's the catch?" Giotto asked, a moment later, after contemplating about the issue.

G helped up his hands in surrender, "There's no catch. I just wanted to make the allegiance with the Tortellini family a lot easier for you."

Giotto smiled at his childhood friend, feeling grateful and happy for his considerate friend. He stopped mid-way, a panicking thought entering his mind. He looked at G with wide eyes.

"I don't know how to court girls, G! I never courted," he cried out in panic, "what if I mess up our allegiance by ruining it?"

"Relax, man. It's simple Giotto. Girls aren't _that_ hard to understand, I mean is Elena hard to understand?"

"Elena _is_ hard to understand," Giotto reminded. He remembered that Daemon's girlfriend had a tendency to become emotional over the slightest things; anything could drive her into frenzy. How Daemon coped was beyond his imagination.

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that. But she's different; I'm talking about other girls." G said.

"She's still a girl."

G pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration and sighed with exasperation, "We're talking about Fiore now. She has been recently rejected by her supposed fiancé a couple of weeks ago and she had become a little reclusive and reluctant to court other men. Her father wants that to change and I thought that you would be the perfect man to change her mind."

Giotto listened, his mouth gaping, "How do you know all that, G?"

G blushed a little, scratching his cheeks in embarrassment, "Oh, I did a little digging and I found out that you're the perfect man for Fiore."

Giotto narrowed his eyes in suspicion, "How long were you planning this?"

"Quite a while if I be honest. Today was the best opportunity to tell you about it."

"That's interesting, G, but I don't think I want to risk this," Giotto said, after a long moment of contemplation.

"Well, the thing is boss, I already told her about you and she wants to meet you. And _today_ is the best opportunity."

"G!" Giotto whined, "why did you do this to me!"

But before he could reprimand him, G ran out of the room and shouted, "Dress up properly, she likes a man with class."

And suddenly he was gone, leaving Giotto open mouthed, staring at the papers cluttered up in his office and thinking that an afternoon of signing contracts was much better than going out and courting a girl—a girl who's father properly has anger issues and would not hesitate to destroy the Vongola if anything happened to his little girl. Giotto was now feeling more nervous than ever. How was he going to get out if this?

**XxX—XxX**

**The Date:**

"Many men have told me that I'm beautiful, but that isn't really surprising is it? _I am_. What's the point of telling somebody something that they know? I mean, how would _you_ react if somebody told you that you are the most powerful mafia family? It isn't a compliment is it, it's a fact right?" Fiore gabbled, twirling her long curly hair, she pouted and straightened the tight black dress she was wearing and unfolded her legs, "Gosh, did you know that daddy said that because of my beauty, many girls hate me? Why would they be jealous of something I'm gifted with?"

Giotto sat in the restaurant, trying his best to maintain a straight face as Fiore continued to babble about herself. In just the half an hour, Giotto had deduced—not surprisingly—that Fiore was the biggest narcissistic girl in the world. All she really talked about all through their main course was herself and just how many money daddy earns. He could now understand why the former man she had courted rejected her. Giotto was trying his best to be patient.

"Did you know what daddy did to the man who rejected me," she asked, blinking her brown doe eyes and smiling.

Giotto had heard. She had told him at the beginning—in a threatening voice—that the man she had first courted was disposed of in the most unimaginable way. She had said, with a straight face, that she didn't feel regret after her daddy dealt with him and she knew that Giotto wouldn't end up that way. According to her, he was too kind for that kind of action.

"Yes, Fiore, I know," Giotto said, forking through his spaghetti. How long did G expect him to endure this torture?

Her eyes flashed dangerously and she smiled, pouting "Well, yes, I still want to tell you again."

Giotto listened with mustered interest as Fiore retold the tale of the man who dared reject her. She had not once asked anything about Giotto and he wouldn't have been surprised if she only knew his name and family. Nothing else about him had been asked this evening, it was all about Fiore.

"Hey, you're rich aren't you, Gio?" She asked suddenly, cutting short into Giotto's thoughts.

She insisted on calling him 'Gio' because it was a cute pet name.

"Not exactly," he began tersely, "but you can say I'm well off."

"Oh wow! You must be really rich to maintain the Vongola! Daddy said that he looks up to you!" She squealed in delight, "imagine how much money we could have if we married?"

Giotto's cheeks flamed with embarrassment, "M-marriage?" he stuttered. This girl was speeding him up. This was the first time he became acquainted with a girl and she was already talking about marriage. He was in the midst of learning about the opposite sex now.

She nodded, eyes shining, "Yes, daddy said that I would have a good future if I married the Vongola boss."

Giotto looked at the girl in front him, "Well, I'm not ready to settle down yet, Fiore."

Fiore's nostril flared and she huffed in irritation, "Well you can still be my fiancé."

"I thank you for your kind offer, Fiore, however as I've told you before, I'm not looking into marriage currently," Giotto said, trying to maintain his professionalism. He was mentally killing G over and over again in his mind for putting him in this situation. This girl was worse than Elena (and that was saying something.)

Fiore froze, as though he had slapped her, "Are you rejecting me?" she wailed, standing up.

"N-no-o I mean y-yes, I mean I don-n't know Fiore!" Giotto backtracked, staring at the girl who was now threateningly glaring at him with contempt.

"You are rejecting me aren't you? Am I not beautiful enough? Do I have a blemish that makes me look hideous? Am I that undesirable to men?" She cried, touching her face and sobbing dramatically, "or is it because you really don't have enough money to support our wedding?"

"W-w-we-d-ding?"

"I know! You're just shy aren't you, Gio! Oh, don't be ashamed of me, I'm your fiancée now!" She stopped crying and wiped away her tears and smiled brightly, all sunshine, forgetting about her previous dilemma.

"I'm not ready for a relationship, Fiore!" Giotto cried out in sudden frustration, "I'm not that kind of man."

Fiore froze, her lips trembling, "So you hate me, is that it? Because I'm too pretty for you, too good to be true and you're just stingy because you don't want to share your money!"

"Pardon?" The girl was the epitome of crazy. She wasn't making sense anymore and she was making Giotto feel really uneasy. G certainly hadn't done his homework properly with this girl.

"You know, I won't allow it this time! You can't just reject me like that Giotto! I thought you were better than that jerk!"

"You're really nice Fiore, and I'm happy to have acquainted with you today and I had a really nice day, however I'm not interested in pursuing any further than this." Giotto said, in the most calming and soothing voice.

Suddenly, without warning, Fiore burst out crying, wailing loudly and attracting the attention of the other people who were inside the restaurant. Giotto watched with embarrassment as a waiter rushed to her aid. The people in the restaurant were giving him weird looks and were staring at him as though he was the perpetrator of this scenario—according to them, Fiore was a victim.

"You won't get away with this Giotto! I swear I'll tell daddy what you did to me and he'll deal with you! Our allegiance contract is officially broken!" She hissed through tear-stained eyes, sobbing.

Giotto knew she meant it and wondered how things would have been had he heeded G's advice in not pissing of a Tortellini member. How would the boss react if he found out Giotto had broken his darling's heart? It was not a pleasant thought and Giotto did not want to indulge in it further. He had better escaped now before the crowd dispersed and he was the only one standing, left with Fiore, alone in the restaurant.

Giotto wasn't a coward, but he knew when he wasn't needed and now was it. Quickly he scrambled out of his chair and ran out of the restaurant, Fiore's threat hanging in the air. It was at that moment he decided that to keep track of big mistakes like this, he would definitely need a diary. And also, this would be the last time Giotto courted a girl from a mafia family—they were dangerous and he had to stay away from them.

**XxX—XxX**

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The occupants of the room listened raptly as Giotto finished his tale. It had brought back unpleasant memories for Giotto and he remembered the threat that was issued—he was still waiting for Fiore's bulky father to enter the room and try to 'dispose' of him.

"Man! Why didn't you tell me that happened?" G asked, laughing as Giotto sulked sullenly, "and here I thought you had a great time! You said that it went all well."

"I was afraid of the consequences it would bring," Giotto said, "besides, you didn't warn about her narcissism and the fact that she is a gold-digger!"

"That seemed like an interesting day," Asari said, chuckling amusedly, "but the threat of the Tortellini family still hangs in the air."

"I'm still getting over the fact that boss courted a girl," Lampo said, pointing a finger at Giotto.

They sat in silence for awhile as they digested the information Giotto had just given.

"What will happen to us?" Lampo asked, after a moment of silence.

"Nothing. Or at least I hope so," Giotto answered, "I hope that the threat was just a threat. Nothing serious."

"We get rid of them and dispose of every Tortellini member," a voice said, interrupting them.

Giotto whipped around, shocked to see Alaude standing there at the edge of the door, his arms folded.

"Alaude!"

"Hnh, are you that weak that you can't handle a family?" He replied in turn.

"We mustn't resort to violence, unless it's absolutely a must," Asari said, smiling at Alaude.

"Where'd you come from anyway?" G asked, staring at him.

"I was here for a long time." Alaude answered curtly, "and I heard everything."

Giotto smiled uneasily. It was typical of Alaude to walk in stealthily in a room and eavesdrop. He wondered how much he heard. Did he know that he possessed a diary now?

"So you know that Giotto bought a diary?" G asked, winking conspirationaly at Giotto.

"Hnh, a clever idea to keep track of mistakes," Alaude answered simply.

"I thought so too," Asari said, beaming, "now it is much easier for boss not to repeat his mistakes. And it will help other future Vongola successors."

"If there any more successors!" Lampo cried out, clutching his green curls, "we still have the Tortellini threat because of boss!"

"Leave them to me," Alaude said, grabbing the handcuffs that were dangling from his trousers. G grinned and clenched his fists.

Giotto shook his head, "No guys, we won't deal this with violence."

"You got an idea then, boss?" G asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Yes. No. But I will have soon if you let me think. We'll deal with this normally, without any violence." Giotto said, grabbing the diary and pen from his desk, before writing:

_The first tip that I can give is that people should stay away from courting narcissist girls who gold-dig mafia bosses for their money. Abstain from them and do not go near them! Especially if their father has a tendency to dispose of the people who break their girl's heart._

Now, that was great, he thought with a smile. He hoped that future mafia bosses would read this and heed the advice written on it. It was the words of wisdom from Giotto.

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_**P. **_**: ** _Since Giotto's time is approximately 400 years into the past, I thought that they would use old-fashioned lingual such as 'courting' instead of 'dating'. It sounded quite cute on Giotto, if I must say so myself ;). I like the idea of him giving advice to mafia bosses and mafia wannabes by writing tips on his diary. Anyway I wanted to write the nightmare date for ages and viola! Fiore came to mind…what a brat! _

_I wonder how Tsuna will react if he ever read this? ;)_

_So next tip (I mean chapter) will be: Avoiding Mafia wars at all cost. (Updating schedule may be sporadic due to other story updates like Seven Rainbow Realm Academy and Military or Mafia Roulette.)_

_Review please! I wanna know if this story idea is nice. :) Ciao and peace out! (Y)_


	2. How to avoid 'potential' mafia wars

**P. :**_ I'm really sorry guys that chapter 2 took a long time. I was giving myself excuses really, one after another. But I got off my lazy butt and decided that after unknowingly winning a writing competition for chapter 1 (My cousin entered me without my consent) that "Hey, this story does have potential!"_

_Every advice will be at the beginning of the chapter!_

_So thank you to the 7 epic reviewers: _**Dumti, ****SkyFlameLitMoon23****, Soul of the World, ****NezumiShion4Life****, ****long live marshmallows, ChocolateChipMuffins**** and someone far away . ^_^**

_You made this Ninja's day! ^^_

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**DISCLAIMER:**_ DO I OWN KHR? WELL DO I? NO. THANK YOU._

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**_/_**_If one wanted to avoid a 'potential' mafia war, one should be prepared to lose his dignity. Hiding away and scurrying in the darkness will be the only option—as it had been for me._

_But please, as a mafia boss, I do hope that you are able to retain your position as boss (Right-hand men have tendencies for stealing your position.)_

_Giotto, Vongola mafia boss.** /**_

* * *

Giotto did not enjoy this. _Not in the least bit_. He hated the idea of being cooped up inside his mansion in case of a 'potential rift' between him and the Tortellini family. _What rift_? All Giotto had done was gently tell the girl he was courting that she wasn't the one for him. He was hardly liable for raging a war and creating tension.

Right now Giotto was absolutely bored out of his mind. Of course it wasn't his idea to stay inside and watch the raindrops fall slowly from his window pane and silently cheer for the dominating rain-drop to win the race of reaching the end of the window. G had proposed the idea and Giotto, willingly like an idiot, agreed to it—that is until he woke up the next morning and realized what he had signed himself up to.

Giotto exhaled a loud sigh, on purpose, so that G who was studying a few papers in the next room would hear. Giotto wanted him to hear, he hoped he did—why shouldn't he? He was the one who subjected him to this utter boredom. Wasn't _he_ supposed to be the boss who ordered and exhibited an ounce of responsibility? G had taken the responsibility away from him and told him that he was in a 'potentially dangerous position.' G had come to love using the word 'potential.' Everything had a 'potential' in it, be it the tea he ordered or the bed he slept in. G had literally taken on the task of boss temporarily because he didn't believe that Giotto could cope with the imminent threat imposed on him.

"G!" Giotto yelled, sitting upright and sauntering to G's room where he was busily signing things, "tell me why I'm sitting here, day and night, doing _nothing_? Whilst _you_ take up my job?" He stood by G, pointing an accusing finger at him. G just nodded absentmindedly, still consumed in his task.

"Just a second, Giotto," G said, pushing up the glasses he was wearing, "I'm just reading this contract. It's really important and I can't afford to jeopardize it."

The unspoken word of '_like you did'_ hung in the air like the plague.

"That's just the thing. _I _should be reading the contract!" Giotto cried in exasperation, thrusting an accusing finger in his direction, "It's _my_ job! I'm the boss of this family."

G was dignified enough to stare him straight into the eye. He pushed the glasses back so that it was resting on top of his hair—secretly Giotto thought he had done it to make himself look cool—and said, "But the threat remember? I was being kind enough as your right hand man to aid you in your calamity. I wanted you to be aware and prepared so that you wouldn't stress about the paperwork," G grinned, pushing a few papers up Giotto's face, "unless you changed your mind and still want to do this?"

Giotto stood there for a second. Silent. He was evaluating all that he had been told. G was actually being considerate? But Giotto could have sworn that G had taken his place. Maybe he was thinking too much, after all he was cooped up inside for so long that he even thought his own best friend was conspiring against him.

"So you're not stealing my position as boss?" Giotto asked, narrowing his eyes, trying to clarify a few points.

G gave an incredulous snort, "Me? Boss? Why would you think so?"

"Because—because," Giotto was at loss for words. Was he imaging everything? Was he really becoming paranoid that he genuinely believed his best friend would steal his position? The stress was really taking its toll on him. He decided that a walk through the gardens would clear his head.

Before he turned to leave, G called him back, stilling him to attention. G had a grin plastered on his face, a pen balanced precariously on his lips, "You know I was thinking about it."

"About what?"

"Taking your role as a boss," G said suppressing a low throated chuckle. He turned to face his paperwork again, pretending that he had said nothing.

Giotto stared at him for a second, his eyebrows raised to his hairline. G was having him on, and Giotto knew it. He shook his head at G's cheap blow and with a dignified stance, sauntered slowly but purposefully out of the room.

It was about time that Giotto handled the case of the Tortellini himself; after all he was a mafia boss of the Vongola family.

_And Vongola's never give up._

**xXx—xXx **

_Half an hour later…_

"Boss! You can't be outside! They'll get you!" Lampo moaned when Giotto finally decided to step outside of the mansion. He clutched his green hair in alarm and his eyes widened with fear. He looked at Knuckle who was standing next to him for consolation and interference—Lampo hated the idea of a controversial mafia war and would have liked nothing better than staying at home until the all clear.

Giotto gave an insufferable exaggerated sigh, "I know Lampo, and it is about time that I settle matters with my own hands."

"Are you sure about this boss? You will be protected by the good Lord," Knuckle said solemnly, "however it is best that you stay inside for a while longer. The Tortellini family have openly declared a war with us, I heard."

Lampo nodded eagerly, "Yes, and they said they'll bathe in your blood and use your carcass as a trophy!"

Knuckle frowned, a bemused look on his face as he assessed Lampo, "They did not say that Lampo. They have merely stated their belligerence towards our family."

Lampo rolled his eyes, feeling a little irritated by Knuckle for refuting his facts "I know they didn't, I was just exaggerating and I wanted the boss to know how serious it was."

Giotto smiled, a determined look on his face, "That's just it, isn't it Lampo? They want me to run away with my tails between my legs but I won't give them the satisfaction," Giotto puffed out his chest and with every ounce of his asserted authority announced, " from today on, I hereby declare a war against the Tortellini family!"

If Giotto had expected an explosive of cheers and a stampeding of feet with a standing ovation, he was in for a nasty surprise. What he got was a confused look from both of his guardians and a heavy frown that marred both of their faces. They looked afraid and apprehensive about something.

"What?" Giotto asked after an awkward pause.

"Well the thing is boss," Lampo began nervously, slowly edging away from him, "the war against us has already been declared by Fiore. Asari and Alaude are investigating. G said…"

Giotto stood there, feeling gobsmacked and betrayed, "G told you but he didn't tell me?"

Knuckle shrugged, "I did try to tell you boss, just a moment ago I told you that…"

Giotto held his hand up, "Did G tell you?"

The silence affirmed his suspicion.

"Right, I'll march right back in to the office and demand to know why I have been kept in the dark," Giotto said, his eyes narrowed.

"But…."

"No Lampo, I will not listen to any excuses. The Tortellini have declared a war with me, so I have a right to know everything."

"But boss…"

"Lampo, you're testing my patience now. I have been cooped up for the past few days and I feel really irritated by G's behaviour."

"That's the thing boss!" Lampo whined, pointing at the back of Giotto, his eyes fixed on a certain spot.

"What is?" Giotto asked skeptically.

"I'm here and at your service, that's why," the voice of G interrupted Giotto, shocking him. G emerged from behind him a smug smile on his face as he assessed the situation.

"Before you say anything," G began, noticing Giotto's mouth opening. He began ticking off with his fingers with a bored tone, "Yes, I have sent Asari and Alaude to spy on the Tortellini family. No, it wasn't to keep you in the dark. Yes your life was in potential danger and no, I was just aiding you as your right-hand man. Did that clear things up or do you have more questions for me?"

Giotto's mouth closed with a sharp click. G knew him too well, which sometimes was rather disadvantageous. He had pretty much answered all the questions that Giotto had in mind. All he had right now was one question.

"Actually, you haven't answered everything," Giotto said in the same presumptuous tone that G had just adopted, "there is still one more question."

G gave a wary smile, "Shoot away boss."

With a long dramatic pause, Giotto said, "When will you stop using the word 'potential'? It's irritating."

G's eyebrows rose to his hairline. He spluttered incredulously, "What?"

"Well, all week all you have been dictating is about 'potential' mafia rifts, 'potential' dangers and everything else that had the word 'potential' in it. Some didn't even make sense! You said that my bed was 'potentially' good for making sleep comfortable," Giotto ranted, leaking out all of his frustration from the last few days of mansion arrest.

Knuckle and Lampo raised their eyebrows, interested in the sudden development. Giotto ignored them, he was on a roll. G had to understand how suffering it was to stare at window-panes.

"Also, all you have told me to do all week is stay at home, do nothing whilst you take my job. And right now as your boss I order you to allow me to get back into position, things will be different now!"

"You _order_ me to allow _you_?" G said with confusion.

Giotto ignored him and faced Knuckle, "Contact Asari and Alaude. We will handle this differently."

They all stared at the newly transformed Giotto, baffled at his sudden behaviour change. Why was he so caught up about the issue?

"If you'd been so passionate about the issue you could have told me," G said, "I was going to sort this out without any fuss because you said you didn't want any violence."

Giotto rolled his eyes, "I'm not going to use violence right now. I said we will handle this—"

A loud explosion stopped his speech mid-track. The whole mansion shook vehemently. Lampo's eyes widened as he crouched down in fear and shielded himself. Knuckle stared at the place where the noise had come from, clenching his fist. G raised his eyebrows, shrugging at the baffled Giotto whose mouth was gaping.

"What is that?!" Lampo cried out in alarm.

"An explosion of some sort," G provided, trotting towards the area, "I'll go check it out."

"There will be no need there," a cold familiar lilt that Giotto had heard just not long ago said, coming from behind them, "daddy had given me enough time to divert your attention."

Giotto spun around to face, inevitable, the woman whose heart he had broken.

"Fiore!"

"Hi _Gio_, I came here to settle things. It's about time you face me like a man," she said, her cold brown eyes scanning his as she smiled superficially. She was still wearing the same tight black dress that she had worn during their courting.

Lampo stood up and gazed at her, a forlorn look in his eyes, "Boss dumped you? But you're beautiful! Let me take you out to a real Italian restaurant and you will not regret courting me—"

_Whack!_

He reeled back in shock as Fiore slammed him with her handbag. Her eyes narrowed into tiny slits as she hissed, "I have already broken the contract with you damn Vongola! Don't come near me you creep."

Lampo looked stunned, his mouth gaping open. He made wild gestures at Knuckle who tried supressing a small smile. Fiore had lived up to her reputation.

"Now all of you step back. This is between me, Giotto and daddy," she surveyed the guardians. Her eyes rested on G who had his hands in his pockets, waiting for her to finish her speech. She found it incredulous that he dismissed her like that and screeched, "I know you! You're the right-hand man here aren't you? You think you're better than me? Better than _us_?"

"What makes you think that?" G asked calmly, putting a comforting arm on Giotto's shoulders.

"Because—"

"You have an inferiority complex."

"Let me—"

"And you think that you have right over anybody."

"Excuse me?"

"Also," G answered gleefully, enjoying her reactions, "you have daddy issues too.

Fiore's eyes widened with disbelieving shock. Giotto couldn't help but feel a teeny tiny taste of victory as Fiore screamed obscenities at them.

"Oh, daddy will hear about this…he is here you know? Currently he is disarming the security in your mansion," she jabbed a finger in Giotto's chest and spat, "oh you won't be happy when he returns and find out what you did!"

Giotto, somehow, didn't seem to care anymore. He knew he had to survive this because he planned to write a whole lot about his encounter and give advice to the future mafia bosses. He hoped; no he wished that they would heed his advice because he was not going to put himself in danger just so other mafia bosses could ignore it.

"Listen Fiore, please leave this property now," Giotto said, getting serious.

Fiore ignored him and continued to rant, "Well you will all pay—in full. Nobody messes with us, nobody. Because you're Vongola you think—"

"Fiore," Giotto said, his tone rising an octave.

G watched with amusement. Lampo was still nursing his sore cheeks but still watched the tension crackling between Giotto and Fiore. Knuckle kneeled down and started praying right there and then.

At last Fiore spun around to face Giotto.

"Get. Out. Of. My. Property," he hissed with as much clarity as he could muster.

"You think I' going to run away just because—"

"Listen to him for God's sake!" G said, losing his temper, "he's serious and really irritated right now. I assure you that you will not want to be on the receiving end of this. _Trust me_."

Giotto pinched his eyes shut. He was well pissed off by now. He was human and there were limits to what he could take. He had been driving himself crazy by staying cooped up and now the object of his anger was standing right in front of him. He wasn't going to touch Fiore, Giotto prided himself in not hitting women, but he was going to get her out of his property because he was getting a headache right now.

But before Giotto could give her a piece of her mind, a loud booming voice interrupted them.

_"Now which one of you three pipsqueaks broke my darling's heart?"_

It seemed as though the day was getting better for Giotto.

Another voice could be heard—an oh so familiar voice that Giotto didn't want to hear right now.

"Nufufu~ I did try to stop him, but he was scaring away my Elena."

Giotto sunk to the ground, burying his face on his knees and wrapping his arms around himself. He had a very strong urge to face- palm. His diary was going to be filled by the end of this day. That is if he did manage to get over this tedious ordeal.

Why did being a mafia boss suck right now?

* * *

**P. :** Bleh! This chapter was a bit weird and difficult to write. :/ Maybe the holiday has sucked away all of my dry humour. What do you think?

Still….

…

..

.

**Boo!** Happy Halloween to all of you! XD

Oh next chapter will be: **Facing disputes like a boss.** Because Giotto isn't a coward and he hates running away ^^


	3. How to get trolled

**PSN**: *raises hands* _Yeah I know. Wars have finished. We started using flying cars, there is gonna be a roboploptic or a zombie apocalypse soon and unicorns have come to existence and perhaps most of you are married and bear children. But before you give me the "Slowest Author" Award, can I first nominate my muse, Ninja who controls this story? Or would an apology suffice? _

_D: Really, I did have an excuse. I was having a mid-teen crisis and getting over bereavement—which is pretty hard for somebody you REALLY loved. _

* * *

_**Disclaimer**__**:**__ Hey guess what? Just got a call and I have been told that I'm the creator of KHR in a parallel world. It's called Katekyo Sexy Reborn and all the girls are kickass and none of the guys wear shirts and it sells better! Beat that Amano, beat that!_

* * *

Giotto is currently unable to write an advice due to being overwhelmed by the randomness of events.

* * *

"So," Giotto drawled slowly, leaning back against his chair. He patiently tap-tapped his pen on his desk, as he waited until the suspense in the room thickened. He gave an impassive nod of his head as he paused, waiting for the perpetrators in question to allow the words to sink in, "tell me, how you were able to pass through our heavy security and infiltrate our mansion?"

"Mmhyphhf!" was the intelligent muffled reply that came from the perpetrator in question.

Giotto rolled his eyes in exasperation as the Tortellini boss trashed about in the heavily roped chair. His daughter Fiore was also tied adjacent to him, and if Giotto wasn't imagining it, she was sending death glares his way. The reason they were unable to communicate coherently was because Daemon, after hearing about the infiltration, decided to give Giotto his special stash of duct-tape for the Vongola special Torture and Tell method—Giotto, knowing that his Mist guardian had masochist tendencies, didn't bother to ask him where he had purchased the duct-tape from and to what purpose he had bought it for. After all, some matters were a little more delicate than others, especially when said matters concerned your Mist Guardian.

The aforementioned guardian was sitting smoothly in the seat next to Giotto, a placid smirk firmly placed on his face as he gazed steadily at the culprits. He held a whip in his hand, fingering the coarse rope, his face morphing into a sadistic grin as he decided to 'test' it every now and then. Each attempt made the Tortellini boss flinch and cower as the rope licked at his toes.

Giotto also had no idea why Daemon carried a whip with him and where he had gotten it from. What he did behind closed doors was none of his business, even if at times, Giotto worried about Elena who may have been the receiving ends of these tools. A thought that made Giotto blush scarlet.

G, who was patiently sitting next to Giotto, stared with a raised eyebrow. He sighed loudly, his patience running thin and feeling annoyed. He jerked his thumbs at the perpetrators, "So, do you still want to go ahead with the duct-tape method and allow me to translate, or shall I remove it, so they can communicate coherently," he pointed at the red-faced boss whose face had become contorted with anger.

"Nnnjhsjg!" came the answer of the Tortellini boss, who seemed to have been wholeheartedly agreeing with G. Fiore, continued to glare from her seat, her eyes burning through Giotto.

"Nufufu~ I would rather have felt more pleasure if we continued torturing them," Daemon smirked, appraising his victims.

Giotto ignored Daemon's remark and raised his eyebrows at G, a dubious look eminent on his face. He observed the irritated red-head closely, "You can translate?"

G chuckled self-consciously, rubbing his temple awkwardly as he coughed discreetly. "Of course I can translate. I've been deciphering the mumbling of Lampo ever since he became a teenager. He is a mystery within himself."

That was understandable, Giotto thought with an empathetic smile. Lampo did at times speak in a language that was very incoherent. He would go outside most of the time and hang out with his "friends" to return back to the mansion with words that had never been uttered by any respectable young gentlemen of his age. Words that would give any respectable man a heart-attack if they heard it. But then again, Giotto mused with fondness, Lampo's friends weren't going to win the _Gentleman Award_ anytime soon if their behaviour was anything to get by. The crude remarks about women especially had Giotto blushing and spluttering whenever he was unfortunate enough to be within hearing distance. What kids his age were up to at this period was alarming to say the least—and this was coming from a nineteen year old.

"Do it," Giotto ordered, running a hand through his golden locks, happy to finally assert his power as a boss. "I'm fed up of hearing his muffled swearing. I want to ask him more questions anyway."

"Then what was the point of you duct-taping them in the first place?"

Giotto felt a little stumped at the question. He had only taken it for the benefit of Daemon who had insisted that it was the best torture method. Now though, it didn't seem like an attractive idea anymore. Originally Giotto found the proposal to be excellent; after all, what mafia boss didn't like the idea of duct-taping mafia criminals?

Daemon chuckled at the exchange, his hands still gripping the whip precariously, "Duct-taping is a method I tend to use whenever a situation that is similar to this arises. There is nothing wrong with my intentions," Daemon regarded Giotto with an amused face, winking at him from behind G.

Giotto shuddered, rubbing his arms as goose-pimples covered his skin. Whether Daemon admitted it or not, his mist Guardian did not have any pure intentions with the duct-tape. He just had to investigate that for another case, after he dealt with the boss and his daughter.

"Sure," G sneered at Daemon, "your intentions are _so_ pure because you just_ happened_ to have a duct-tape and whip in handy."

Daemon's cool demeanour was unruffled as he considered G nonchalantly, "And your point?"

"My point is that your intention are not pure."

"If you have anything interesting to say about my methods, then why don't you share it with us, G?"

Giotto watched the argument between his two guardians, his hands dangerously gripping his desk. He waited and realized that if he didn't intervene, the vacillating argument would escalate and nothing would be done by the end of this. _Goddamit_, Giotto thought, today was not the best of days for him. His patience was running low and a puerile argument was not going to cement the case any further.

"I told you that I find you—" G began, but was intercepted by an angry Giotto.

"STOP! The two of you. Don't bicker like an old divorced couple"

Both Guardians turned to face him, their faces grave. When the noise level in the room subsides, Giotto allowed himself to smile, appreciating the fact that the semi cat-fight had ended.

"Great. Now G, please peel off the duct-tape and Daemon, right now please do understand that nobody cares about the duct-tape and whip," Giotto stressed, heaving a huge sigh. He hadn't wanted to lose his temper and shout, but the scenes of the Tortellini boss entering his garden and Fiore accusing him plus the cat-fight between G and Daemon had ignited his fury.

G nodded in understanding and tip-toed towards the grumpy boss who was currently trashing viciously in his chair like a wild boar. His eyes were blazing with unadulterated fury. Giotto would have been wary had he not looked comical in his high-chair. He looked like a big baby playing mafia. He was _that_ small and short. Giotto had to get a special high-chair to interrogate him, because he wanted to be at eye-level with him before he cross-examined him.

Fiore was the only one who was sitting calmly, her eyes locked on Giotto. She was gazing steadily at him, no doubt planning ways to kill him, if the throbbing tick on her forehead was anything to go by. Her hands were dangerously lying on her lap and Giotto knew without question that those very delicate hands would strangle him the moment they had the chance. There was just something about Fiore that made Giotto's spine chill. She seemed more ruthless compared to her father, and there was something else too. Giotto wasn't too sure what it was, but it was not something he enjoyed.

Giotto exhaled loudly with irritation; staring out of his window as he waited for his right-hand man to remove the heavy duct-tape that was hindering the interrogation process. One thing he disliked about his role as a mafia boss was the fact that he almost always had to be on the receiving end of these tedious ordeals of handling cranky mafia bosses who always thought they knew better because they were older.

"Done," G said with triumph, sitting back down in his seat, right next to Giotto. "You can handle 'em from here boss."

Daemon stared with unmasked sorrow as the used duct-tape fell to the ground.

Giotto relaxed in his chair as he stared at the oddly silent perpetrators. The boss was staring at him, his mouth pursed tightly. It was as though he was purposefully keeping quiet. Fiore, who was sitting next to her father, was gazing uninterestingly at her nails. For somebody who can't keep their mouth shut, Fiore was really putting an effort in keeping her silence. Her eyes swivelling once in a while to gaze coldly at Giotto who had to flinch every time her brown eyes bore calculatingly in to his own blue orbs. It felt as though her father and she were planning something, and Giotto felt wary.

"So," Giotto began again, resuming the interrogation, "how were you able to—"

"Shut up!" Fiore barked, rolling her eyes, "why don't you just get over this and punish us. Daddy and I don't mind."

Her father looked at her, an agonized expression on his face, "Baby, don't do this to us. You know very well what this man is capable of."

Fiore held back a snort, "Yeah? I know what you're capable of too daddy. I saw you get rid of my first ever boyfriend. We can deal with this bastard too," she bared her teeth, glaring at Giotto.

G shook his head, "Well, this escalated quickly."

Giotto watched with disbelief, as daughter and father argued.

"Darling, I don't know how to tell you this, but your boyfriend is still alive and well," her father answered sheepishly, squirming in his chair—which is hard, considering that he was tied heavily.

"WHAT?" Fiore screeched, her eyes widening with astonishment. "But you said you got rid of him. Don't tell me that you _lied._"

G, Giotto and even Daemon watched the midget boss squirm even further in his seat, his eyes searching the ceiling.

"I, well you see honey, I….I did kind of get rid of him. Your ex-boyfriend is living in a mountain in Japan. I threatened that if he stepped in Italy, he will be dealt with."

Fiore's mouth gaped open like a dead fish. Her hands trembled as she stared at her father, searching for any sign that he was joking with her. Giotto cringed as tears streamed down her face, a slow sob escaping her lips. He was reminded of that night he took her to the restaurant and she had played victim. But, Giotto thought, this was different. Fiore felt betrayed by her father and that was a little hard for her to take in.

"You bastard!" She shrieked, prompting G to cover his ears and shudder. "How dare you lie to me? He is dead. _Dead_. Dead! You killed him father, I don't care what you say!" She continued to sob, her shoulders heaving.

"This is why I chose Elena," Daemon said with a sneer, "women are less trouble when you have them in control."

G groaned disgustedly, "Please Daemon, we're trying to get to the bottom of the case."

Daemon shrugged, "Nufufu, if boss wants me to whip her in to order, then give me the command," he said running his hands through the whip lovingly.

Giotto gave a small smile, his eyes still trained on Fiore who was exploding, "I think I can handle this."

"Please boo-boo, don't do this to me," now Fiore's dad was tearing.

Giotto felt like he had just stepped in to a soap opera, one that he was currently part of.

"Fiore!" Giotto shouted, catching her attention, albeit for a small second before she continued to bawl again.

"I hate men! They are all liars and nobody likes me! Why do I always get the jerks! Why can't I have love, am I so undesirable?"

Giotto watched with helpless dismay, his mind wandering to this afternoon when he had everything under control. When he had sent his Guardians Knuckle and Lampo—reluctantly—to the Tortellini mansion, because he was a little worried about Asari and Alaude (Though he shouldn't have, considering that they were perfectly capable of handling themselves). He remembered ordering Daemon and G to take the culprits to his office where they would be interrogated respectively.

**XxX-XxX **

**_Before the horrific events that unfolded:_**

Giotto stood still, his knuckles tightly clenched in a fist as he looked at the Tortellini boss who was still a little far away. His gaze was levelled with the boss—though it was a little straining since Fiore's father was a little more than a midget. He hoped his glare could convey his emotions and make the Tortellini boss back off because Giotto was absolutely fed up with having to tread carefully on what G had described as, 'egg-shells.' Why did he have to hide away whilst Fiore and her father were allowed to wander nonchalantly—not so casually if you include the bombs— into his garden and command compensation for Fiore's date? Giotto was now prepped up for a war with the Tortellini family. He did not care if G expressed displeasure.

Vongola was not going to go down because of a derisory family.

_No._

Giotto was ready for business. Who messes with the Vongola and gets away with it?

_Nobody._

"So, boss, what're you going to do?" G asked casually, his arms folded as he waited for Giotto to take action. He appraised his boss admiringly.

Lampo gave an involuntary shiver, rubbing the goose-bumps from his arms, he clung to Giotto's sleeve and begged, "Yes, boss. Do something, please!"

"Peace first," Knuckle said, though his eyes were hardened and his knuckles clenched.

"Nufufu, I think that all they need is just a bit of torturing," Daemon added, standing in the side-line, his trademark smirk plastered on his face.

He had just arrived out of nowhere, but Giotto was happy for his Guardians support. He could feel his anger from earlier subsiding and he was able to think more clearly.

"I think we should talk to them first," Giotto declared, "and if they do not co-operate, we will hand it the rough way."

G nodded approvingly, flexing his muscles, "Been a while since I went into a good fight."

"Nufufu, I can cast an illusion and make them scream for mercy," Daemon said, licking his lips in anticipation, "I want to begin with the pretty girl. Seems like she needs a little reality checking from Uncle Daemon."

All 4 guardians stared at him with gaping mouths.

"Uncle what?" they cried in unison.

Daemon smiled, not at all affronted by their incredulity, "A nickname Elena gave," he explained in an off-handed manner.

Giotto decided to let the matter slide. The matter at hand was more serious as opposed to what Elena called Daemon when they were alone. His thoughts were interrupted by Lampo who tugged at his sleeves, a panicked look on his face.

"What?" Giotto enquired.

"Look boss."

Giotto did look and at first saw nothing, but when he looked again, he saw Fiore's dad running towards them—though barrelling would have been the right term, considering that the speed of the aforementioned man was unbelievable for a man of his status.

"Damn," G murmured, running a hand through his hair distractedly. "He really means business, boss. I think we can deal with him for you, you approach Fiore."

"Fiore huh?" Daemon said, "that is her name? Leave her to me. Women are my speciality."

"No way, she is dangerous!" Lampo shouted, pointing at his swelling cheek, the one Fiore had slapped earlier.

"Nufufu, I can handle violent ones too. The more violent, the better for me to handle," Daemon smirked

"Fear the God and deal with her appropriately," Knuckles warned Daemon, casting a glance in his direction.

"The word appropriate is not in his dictionary," G provided.

"And you should know, hmm, G?"

Giotto put a finger to his lips, "Shh. Listen guys. Any second now the boss will be on our tail, so do this okay. Just follow my orders."

They all nodded as Giotto conveyed his idea, his eyes warily glancing at the advancing boss, his daughter walking purposefully a little behind him, her eyes on him.

"Okay?" Giotto asked, looking at each and one of his guardians.

They all nodded, including Lampo.

"Good, now get back to work," he ordered, "nobody messes with the Vongola, got that?"

**XxX-XxX **

And that was how Giotto ended up back in his office with Daemon and G as his intermediators—because at this stage, Giotto was a little more than pissed at the culprits. This was also why he loved his job as a mafia boss _so much_, because what great mafia boss wouldn't want the chance to deal with perpetrators who are emotionally unstable and hard to handle? Giotto was sure that his diary would be filled today, and he sure hoped that whoever would read it in the future would heed it well. Because Giotto was not going to suffer vainly, that would never happen. He would haunt the future mafia bosses until he made sure that they followed his advices.

Right now Fiore was still at it, screaming obscenities at her own father and every men in the room. Using words that were not appropriate for a lady of her status; or any lady at all. Giotto remembered Lampo and couldn't help but think that they were birds of a feather. Fiore was the female version of Lampo: Spoiled, rich, bratty and always wanted her way.

"Boss, I think this went longer than we expected," G intervened, wincing as Fiore went into Berserk mode.

"Nufufu, my offer still stands," Daemon reminded, experimenting with his whip and cradling it delicately, as though it was his child.

"Wait, I know how to handle this," Giotto said, raising a warning finger at Daemon who was still cradling his whip.

"Please don't punish us!" The once fearsome boss of the Tortellini family cried, "please I'll come clean and I'll return every money my family and I stole from you. I'll even return Fiore's fiancé if you want prove. Please Giotto, don't deal with us."

Giotto raised an eyebrow, "You stole money from me?"

"Please, I'll return them! We just wanted money for our family!"

"Daddy!" Fiore cried, clearing away her tears—Nobody would have ever suspected her of breaking down. "Please don't. Don't tell them."

Her father looked at her pleadingly, "Please honey, our life depends on it. We can throw away our dignity to save ourselves."

"Damn, I think I just stepped into one of Elena's soap operas," G whistled, a grin on his face. "This interrogation is getting interesting."

"I might agree with you," Giotto said, "money was stolen from us? Since when? That's a lie."

The Tortellini boss shook his head, "Please will you listen to us, Vongola boss? Please spare a moment for us."

"Daddy, don't you dare!" Fiore spat her eyes blazing with fury, "I swear to God Daddy—"

"We're not really a proper Mafia family like you. We're Gangsters, but we are broke," he explained, ignoring his daughter's protest, "the Tortellini is really fiction and so is our reputation. We forged everything so that we could get closer to you. I really admire you Giotto, how you become really famous in a short time and gained power. And I wanted, I really wanted my daughter to marry you because you are good for her and I wouldn't have to worry about her all the time."

"I feel like this is going to get dodgy," G commented.

"I don't really have anybody apart from my brother who helped me forge my reputation. I heard about you from him, and he insisted that if my daughter becomes the heir of Vongola, I can have enough money to pay of our debts. So we got Fiore to date you. It was that day that I stole some of your money to be honest. Not much that you would have noticed, but a little to pay of my debts," the Tortellini boss continued meekly.

"My—what?" Giotto was stumped. This was not a story he was expecting at all. He would have understood everything else, but this was, this was absurd.

"Nufufu, seems like your Storm Guardian wasn't doing his job properly," Daemon pointed out.

"Hey! I did," G blushed, blustering, "I just only went for a walk."

"The office was empty," the Tortellini boss amended, "and well, things went from bad to worse when the plan failed and you dumped my darling."

Fiore stared at her dad as though she didn't know him, "You told him. You really told him everything." She sounded shocked, as though she couldn't believe that her secret was finally out in to the open.

Giotto was in bigger shock, he stood up from his seat, "No. You lied just to get me married to your daughter? You stole? Your offences are even worse than walking into my garden without permission." He looked at G who smiled sheepishly at him, "And you G. Weren't you doing paperwork for me? Why did you allow him to steal from me?"

G was silent.

"So….?" The Tortellini boss trailed hopefully, squirming in his seat.

"I'm tempted to tell Daemon to whip you," Giotto said, "and no Daemon, sit back down. But, I don't know what to do with you anymore."

"I don't care if you punish us," Fiore said, "you are not as interesting to me as you were before. I have another man now."

"Who?" G asked.

"He has red-hair, and that is all you should know," she answered coyly.

Giotto face-palmed. This was more than trouble. Now Fiore had fallen for his best-friend.

"He must be lucky," G said with a smile.

And G was falling for it too.

There really was one thing Giotto could do now, one thing that could make everything better.

"Okay. I have a punishment for you," he noticed how the Tortellini boss flinched at the word_ punishment_, "and that is…."

They all looked at him curiously.

"The only way that you can amend for all your mistakes, including the stolen money, is to work for me."

"Never!" This was from Fiore.

"Oh you're too kind, boss!" The Tortellini boss cried.

Sometimes Giotto thought the same thing too.

* * *

**PSN:** _If this chapter was a little bleh-bleh (Including grammatical errors) and not as humorous as you expected, I do apologize O: I'm sleep deprived and my brain is a little tired—okay scratch that, I am MORE than tired. Exhaustion will be more appropriate Lol . OTL_

_Still whatcha y'all think 'bout this? I think I just trolled you all with the Tortellini family. I know I trolled myself ;) I guess the whole: Tortellini arc is over XD_

_P.S: I don't mind if you love/hate Fiore. I have no attachment to her ;)_

_Next chapter look forward to more Daemon, as Giotto and the other's spy on him: **Next advice:** "Be careful around your Mist Guardians."_


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